Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Too Much Thinking

I live in my head. It is all about analysis. I am constantly trying to figure out what to do next, when I should do something, if I should do something, and how to just let go. You cannot think about letting go because if you do then you never will. You just have to let go.

I had a dream many years ago that I was driving in a log, Flinstone-like car...powered by my own efforts. There was an angle in the car with me. We were having a good conversation; I was finding out all kinds of great information and answers to my questions. I was not paying attention to the road, just the angle...as if we were sitting comfortably across from each other on the front porch in rocking chairs, sipping lemonaid. Then I suddenly became aware of a rather large tree that my car was on a collision course for. I forgot about the conversation and turned my attention to my driving. I hit the tree, totaled my log car, and had to walk home. My angle disappeared...I was alone. As I pondered what happened and wished my angel would come back I heard a voice, "you should have just continued with our conversation. The crash only happened because you felt you needed to control the car to avert disaster. Had you continued our conversation, then everything would have been ok."